it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
