if i can run in heels then i can drive
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
