i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
