I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
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