wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Randomize
