I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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