I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
We don't watch enough power rangers
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize
