She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
