If that was your dad, he is hot
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Randomize
