I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Randomize