who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
