So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
How external is "for external use only"?
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
