I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I'm always down for nudity.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
