Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
They took my balls.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Randomize
