its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Randomize
