Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Randomize
