apparently the secret to your success is patron
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
