we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
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