why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
