I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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