I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
so let's talk penis.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Randomize
