Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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