I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize
