i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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