i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
