We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
