His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize