): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
