Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
