I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
