I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
