Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
Mom said you looked used
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
