he puts the penis in happiness.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
We're hate flirting, damnit.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
