Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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