I'm lost and stupid without you.
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
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