Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
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