3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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