So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
