She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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