Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Randomize
