im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Randomize
