Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Randomize
