honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
