Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(513): View more from Ohio

I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?

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(317): View more from Indiana

it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely

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(847): View more from Illinois

everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.

(224): View more from Illinois

it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.

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(502): View more from Kentucky

I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...

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(352): View more from Florida

She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"

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(513): View more from Ohio

Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.

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(419): View more from Ohio

i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes

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(518): View more from New York

Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok

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(630): View more from Illinois

Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.

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