that's an acceptable place to lick
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
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