I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Randomize
