i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
