he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
