Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize