I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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