All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
wow bdsm is so cute
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