I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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